I died yesterday or
today - the old Camus way!
See, It s all like this:
See, It s all like this:
I had built up a reflection
of myself for me
Locking up in
chambers
The darker sides of me and
The darker sides of me and
Believing for myself , “that is’nt me”
Now when by chance
you fell on my trash,
Saw the soot and
rotten egg white
And you asked me all
of that
Just like a “had
your tea?”
I shattered to bits
The wall I built
Became one with
earth
And me with I.
I died
A slow death
Life oozing out of
my eyes
Streaming down my
cheeks
Like a collapsed dam,
my heart
Gosh! I own a river
full of tears!
Now you are
breathing life into me..
I am on the anvil,
Awaiting my birth.
Never again to
disown,
Any of my shades!
The dichotomy of the self often difficult to accept and acknowledge remain at the bottom....and when someone else crack that self-deceptions and self-woven images it causes a turbulence of shame and unavoidable sense of what one to oneself is....;)
ReplyDelete"Awaiting my birth.
Never again to disown,
Any of my shades!".....heartrending! Profound! Dense! And Penetrating!
Love and regards dear Pygma:) "I own a river full of 'thoughts' now":)
Oh My Nasnin
DeleteYou have read it all
and you have told all that in a single line, the shame, the turbulence, sense of what one is to oneself..
Thanks for standing by me
..On the Anvil....
ReplyDeletethey will hammer you to the shape THEY want!!
breathing life in to you...or blowing to burn you more?
Clanging... hits as thunder....
Nice... :)
yes scorpi, that is indeed another side of this.
Deletein this weak state of mind and soul, i overlooked that.
but my trust on this hand is more than I have on me..
such a thought provoking comment, i am pondering...
thank you so much
What a musing..!! :) i could see the walls tumble down and the naked self aching... with the pain and agony of discovery!! loved it!
ReplyDeletenaked self aching.. yes .. thank you dear KP
Deletenothing wrong in being on the anvil, hoping to be reshaped in a better way---after all the driving force in life is hope---cheers ---gud one---with a lotta depth and sense!!! keep writing
ReplyDeleteHope.. yes.. and you, my solace.. Hugs dear
Deleteoh this is beautiful pygma...!
ReplyDeletewas painful though.. thank you smee
DeleteI died
ReplyDeleteA slow death
Life oozing out of my eyes
so sad of u..... pygma even when u think and wait for ur (re) birth, death was cruel to u ... :) good!!!! keep going
not that sad dasaa.. it is my fortune that it happened.. so that i wud be a virtuous me! Thank you so much :-)
ReplyDeleteha....Deep thinking thoughts...good pygme..!
ReplyDeletethanks prince
Deleteyou changed your dp? or its just me feeling the difference?
ReplyDeletebeautiful poem ...liked it :)
glad :-)
DeleteI loved, loved, loved the expressions...especially the opening lines Pygy, you took my heart and breath away with:
ReplyDeleteI had built up a reflection of myself for me
Locking up in chambers
The darker sides of me and
Believing for myself , “that is’nt me”
And then...just like a "had your tea"
it is wow, how you have picked up just the simplest of expressions to signify the most complicated of emotions.
It is never possible that you write something and I don't relate to it:-)
you pamper me dear , with words of approval and appreciation
Deletethere is a lot we share between us, probably because we are women, in its unadulterated form.. thnks dear